Debbie Downer

My wedding dresses arrived, and the reaction to them was quite a bit like this:

Yep. I picked a style of dress that does NOT look as good on me as I thought it would. One of them I’m hoping to send back and get a refund on, and the other one (which is really gorgeous, but just doesn’t look gorgeous on ME!) I’ll try to re-sell online to some other bride who it will fit much better.

So I’m back to square one on the dress front.

Note to self (and others!): DON’T buy your wedding dress online! It’s too risky. Especially if the return policy is tricky. Buying the dress online was probably a stupid idea from the start anyway. I hadn’t really tried on enough dresses to know what actually looks good on me.

In all of the back-and-forth of “hmm maybe this dress could be altered to look better on me”, and “oh my gosh, this is awful”, I finally decided to tell Tobias about my problem. I tried on the dresses to show him and he agreed that they didn’t really flatter my figure so much. I am not fat, gosh-darn-it, but I sure looked fat in these dresses!

I’m glad I showed him.  And we decided to go against tradition and do the next dress shopping together. Now, I’m not knocking this tradition altogether, but I just think it doesn’t really make sense for us. I don’t believe in bad luck anyway, and to me it’s more of an old wives’ tale than anything else.  It’s far more important to me that my groom will actually like the dress! And that’s the thing about weddings – you can do it however you want! Besides, there are plenty of other traditions we are planning on not doing, such as a bridal party, a bouquet/garter toss, etc.

In other news, I got my engagement ring resized while we were snowboarding in Austria and am happy to have my ring back again. It fits so much better and now I’m not worried about accidentally flinging it off somewhere!


6 thoughts on “Debbie Downer

  1. Oh no! I think you’re doing the right thing by finding the right dress for you though. I can’t wait to see pictures!

    P.S. I know I promised to write you a letter — I started to a couple weeks ago, got side-tracked, and managed to misplace what I’ve written so far during my cleaning spree last week (I hate how I always seem to misplace what I’m looking for!). So I think I’m going to try to find some time today to start over. Look forward to getting something in the mail (hopefully) sometime next week!

  2. Hi Sarah,
    I’m sorry the dresses were not as you expected. But you are not alone, there is a LONG list of women who ordered their wedding dresses online and were disappointed. Many of my friends had the same thing. I found it really interesting during my wedding dress shopping experience and accompanying other friends that there are 2 rules:
    1. The dress looking fabulous has nothing to do with one’s figure. You can be a bigger girl or a model and a dress can still look perfect or completely wrong.
    2. What you imagined to be your perfect dress is often completely different to what you end up deciding on.
    After trying on over 30 different styles, the dress I finally decided on was a 1000 miles away from what I had originally thought. It was strapless (NEVER thought I’d go for that) and full lace (same thing, NEVER thought I’d go for lace.seemed so ‘old fashioned’ :)
    But once I tried on that dress, I knew!!
    It may be disappointing that the dresses you ordered were not as you imagined but the upside is that you get to go dress shopping again! Hooray! And that future hubby of yours, with his photographers eye, will be a great help :)
    Have fun!
    All the best,

    • Aw! Thanks, Carol! You’re so right – just because something looks good on the rack, it doesn’t mean it will look good on you! (And vice-versa!)

      I am actually pretty excited to go dress shopping again! That sure is a positive thing about this whole experience.

  3. I work as a bridal dressmaker – mostly doing alterations, but my top tip is to try on every conceivable style – you’ll quickly find out what type of dress suits you (& what certainly doesn’t!), then you can go looking at specifics & detailing – but I suspect that in the mass trying-on session, you’ll find something that’s perfect. Ask other recent brides about where they bought dresses and ask if the shop assistants gave good advice about dress styles etc. – then go to the shops that are known for giving great customer service in terms of finding the customer the right dress.
    Have fun!

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